Of course you know there's a lesson in here for me, right? Adoption will do that, create many situations in which you can learn more about the heart of God and more about the sin in our own hearts. So we had a dear friend over for dinner the other night and I was telling her of my dilemma. I told her that I had prayed about the packing of all this stuff and so when I went to pack it all and I couldn't I was like "Okay God I prayed about this so what gives? It doesn't all fit." Well she just looked at me and wham I realized what I was doing, sure I wanted to take it all down there with us now but the thing is I can't save the world (or even one orphanage for that matter) with a bunch of stuff, in fact I can't save the world at all....that's not what it's all about it. It's about spreading the Gospel message and telling people about a God who would send His only Son to die on cross for our sin because He loves us so much. He is the provider not me, I'm a tool in the work shed, privileged that He even chooses to use me in His plan and so I'll let it go, I'll pack what I can and not worry about the rest and in doing so I'll be a part of a much bigger picture, a picture of a church family, family members, and dear friends embracing our family and showing the love of God by supporting an orphanage in a third world country in a small yet tangible way and in doing so show that it's God that saves, He is the provider and we are the tools. Yes my heart was in the right place and this is a good thing, I want to bless them with a little of what we have, and we have a lot, but just taking "stuff" down there isn't all they need. What we all really need is God and His Son Jesus Christ and that's what I hope to share in this blessing.
OH and one more thing, something I already know but need reminding of, God's not my magic genie who grants my every wish just because I think it's right and because I prayed for it. Okay, enough said, lesson learned, I'm going to meet my kids!!!!!!