Worst Blogger EVER

Okay so you don't have to make me feel better, I know I'm the worst blogger in the world but I do have good intentions.  And today I'm just dropping you a line to let you know that, Yes indeed, we are all still alive.  I will give you all an update, but not today.

Cocooning

Letter adapted and used with permission by Jenny Elliot.  Thanks so much Jenny!

Bringing our kids home.

After two long years we are finally bringing our kiddos home!!!

Thank you for being a part of this journey and for praying for us and our kids. God’s plan of adoption is a beautiful thing and we are finally seeing it come to fruition for our family.

We want to make you aware of some of the parenting guidelines we will be implementing for Samentha and Emmanuel in the first few months home. This was very new information to us as we entered into this world of adoption, and we are giving much prayer and thought to where our personal boundaries need to be regarding these issues. More than ever, we need your prayers, this could potentially be a very challenging time for our family. While you may not understand all or any of what we are doing and why we are doing this we ask that you accept it and respect our decisions. It may seem like we are pushing you away but that is not the case, we love you all and will most definitely need you and your support during this transition time, but please be aware that we may need some space during the initial bonding phase.  That doesn't mean I don't want you to call!

The term that we are referring to is “cocooning.” The recommended timeframe for a family to “cocoon” is MONTHS - with a specific focus being on the first several critical months. Much of this research comes from Karyn Purvis who is a leading expert in all things relating to children who come from hard places.

Here’s the idea....these kiddos have gone through a lot of loss and will be dealing with emotions that we probably didn't even know existed for such small children. Since being in the orphanage they haven't formed an attachment to one caregiver, but instead, many people/caregivers. We need to make deliberate time and space for the kids to attach to Joe and I as parents. Yes, they will also find their place in our family, with Cadie, Jordis, and Coen, but even they can’t become the primary caregivers during this time.

Here are some specifics:

• Affection - we have to be the ones to provide any and all of their care. Food, touch, consoling, rocking...all of these activities need to be done by us right now. You are more than welcome to give them high fives or a kiss on the head or cheek. But please don't pick up, cuddle, or sit either of our adopted children on your lap. I know this sounds awful but it's very important for the well being of our children.

• Their world needs to be small. Just us, in our home, with the occasional outing. When we feel they are able, we will start introducing extended family and friends in small and quiet settings. Please don't be offended if you come by our home and we don't invite you in. It's certainly not because we don't want to but we have to be mindful of our family.

• We need to limit visitors. THIS PAINS ME. You will get a chance to meet them and know them in the future, but for now we need to establish an attachment with Samentha and Emmaneul so that they come to know that we are their parents, their primary caregivers and that all they need will come from us.

• Overstimulation - sometimes with kids from hard places it’s hard to tell what is “too much”. The kids can go from giggling to uncontrolled fit-throwing in an instant. None of it makes “sense” - yet all of it does, when you consider from where they came. Please don’t take it personally if we have to miss an important activity, or excuse ourselves from a situation in the months and years to come.

Again, we are so grateful for the love and support you have given our family. We are praying ultimately that the light of God’s glory will shine brightly in these kids lives as the Lord restores them. Thank you for your understanding and patience!

All our love,

The Kopers

10 mores sleeps......

Now I really feel like the countdown has begun.  The days are going by so quickly 10 days will fly by.

Yiiiippppeeeeee............

AND Aaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhahhhhhhh............

Today I Freaked Out!

Yep, today I freaked out........(Imagine crazy woman running around house pulling out hair trying to do things that really don't matter in the whole grand scheme of things!)

I really had no reason to, nothing happened, nothing changed, and this all still seems so unreal but I started thinking about things and sometimes that's just not a good idea.  I looked into haircare for hair that I have no idea how to take care of (overwhelmed.....), I repacked the kids suitcase, for the third time, and then racked my brain trying to think of all the things I need to get done around the house before the kids come home.  I don't know why it's so important for me to do this, it's not like life is going to stop once our family is united.  Life will continue to move along at a rapid pace and there will be many more things that I just HAVE TO GET DONE.......I don't know why I do this to myself.

I can't really explain how I feel, in fact I don't really know how I feel.  There is so much to think about, so much I don't know, and so much I just wish I didn't know.  I want this to be simple but life just isn't simple is it?  I'm looking for paradise on earth (aren't we all?!?!?) and I know that's unrealistic but it's that ache for rightness with God that I can't seem to find here and I long for everything to be restored.  One day everything will be perfect, everything will be just how it was designed to be but for now I'll trust in the Creator the One who knows infinitely more than I do and I'll rest in that, I'll quiet my soul and lay everything down at the foot of the cross.  So much easier said than done but that's my goal and I hope that you will join me as you go through the chaos and messiness of life and lay your everything down with me.  Jesus has this and when things seem just a little crazy we can know that He has it all worked out.  I know that all sounds so trite but it's true, it's so simple but we tend to complicate things.  All we need to do is keep our focus on Jesus, I'm finding more and more that no matter what I'm going through, when I focus on Him everything else fades to background.  It's not easy but it's a choice and one I have committed to taking over and over again in this life.

We leave for Haiti in 11 more sleeps, we will return with two precious children and this real life, messy  adoption will forever be a beautiful picture of what God has done for us.  He has rescued us from the sin that so easily entangles and from separation from Him, He has given us a place to call home, and He welcomes us as sons and daughters.

Please pray for us as we prepare to transition from a family of five to a family of seven.  It may not be easy but it will be beautiful.

Kopers

Kopers

 Kopers!!!

Oh Happy Day!

On Wednesday, April 9, 2014 we received our I-600 approvals for the kiddos.  Two days later, on Friday, we received our visa appointment!  Today I just booked our tickets!!!!!  Let the countdown begin...........

22 MORE SLEEPS!!!!!!

PRAISE THE LORD!

Praise the LORD!

God granted us a successful trip to USCIS on Monday!  It was a little uncertain at first, the lady said we couldn't be there a week and a half early but she let us wait anyway and we only had to wait for one hour!

Our God is so good.  Now we're just waiting to hear from USCIS in Haiti for our I-600 approval then the visas get issued and then we get to go...........

Thank you all so much for praying!